Mum, more than 7 years have past and I still think of you often. Your still very much missed in my little Norwegian family. It´s Christmas day and the fact that your not here anymore makes the memories of the past even more special. You said to me once that if you had one dying wish it would be that Richard and I would make up and that things would be okay between us. Well I´ve tried, but I´m afraid that despite my efforts to reach out things will never get better while they are met with silence. The treatment I receive feels like a strange type grief for a living sibling. I can´t live with this feeling anymore, so enough is enough. I´ve failed to make your wish a reality and whilst it saddens me deeply I know in myself that I can´t carry these feelings around with me for eternity. I am however forever open to any type of meaningful contact, but sadly will not be continuing in a one way communication with Richard. I hope that he reads this although I don´t suppose that I´ll ever get to know about it. Despite everything I wish him and his family the best, but out of self respect I can no longer be the unrequired fool I´ve made to feel. Your loving son, Ed x